As a mum of young kids, a business-owner and a highly-sensitive woman, I know how much of an emotional rollercoaster life can be.
Let's be honest (because that's what we DO here!), challenging is an understatement. It's mentally, physically and emotionally HARD sometimes to feel this deeply. It can leave you feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and stuck on a daily basis.
I was there myself just over 2 years ago. I was a new mum to two kids under two during a pandemic. And I was secretly struggling.
Two kids under two and the sh*t that nobody tells you
My second baby was a surprise. My son had only just turned one and we were deep in a global pandemic. My first year of being a mum had been surprisingly great! I had launched a business, was in the process of writing a book and was coaching mums of an evening. I felt like I was bossing it! So even though my second pregnancy was a surprise, I wasn't afraid.
Then she arrived. All 7lb 3oz of her was tightly wound into this tiny ball of emotion. She never seemed happy, cried constantly and my husband was working shifts so I was mainly alone.
Except that I was NEVER alone. I had a toddler who needed me, and a newborn who wouldn't be put down. I recall so many nights where I would just sit on the landing between their two bedrooms sobbing as they both screamed to be soothed.
I felt incapable. Overwhelmed. Exhausted. Lifeless. I was surviving, just one day at a time.
But I wasn't really living.
The breakthrough
When my daughter turned one, I returned to work after being at home with my children for 3 years. I dropped them both off at childcare, came home, and just sat in silence.
For the first time in a year, I let out a long breath. I could feel my body again.
It was in this stillness, that I decided to go to Counselling to talk through some of the issues I had experienced in the past year. I remember sobbing in the chair, tissues next to me on the table as I talked about how guilty I felt that my daughter had this lifeless, exhausted version of me.
She looked me lovingly in the eyes and said "you had two children, under two, during a pandemic, with very little support. It makes sense that you found that hard."
And in that moment, she gave me the permission slip that I should have given myself.
The healing
From there I used my existing skills as a emotional freedom coach to overcome my limiting beliefs that made me feel incapable as a parent. But I slowly realised that changing my mind, was just the first step.
Trauma and repressed emotion live in the body. So I learned everything I could about emotional regulation, nervous system resets and how to come home to my peace. I had always been a highly sensitive person and a deep feeler, but I learned that having such an emotional daughter had forced me to confront the fact that I was uncomfortable with expressing those big feelings and had repressed them for many years.
This had led to me feeling anxious, overwhelmed and on edge on a daily basis. I was struggling to express how I felt, had ZERO boundaries when it came to self-care and couldn't take action on any of my goals.
I lovingly walked my body out of survival mode, healed my inner child, started prioritising my needs and began writing again. Writing had always been my biggest passion, and writing on a daily basis helped me to start to process my emotions, and get curious about the world again.
I started to enjoy life for the first time in a really long time.
My confidence built, I cut out all of the distractions and started parenting in a way that felt good to ME, and became the calm, present, peaceful parent I had always dreamed of being.
I stepped into my feminine power, embracing my energy changes and emotional waves with love and was able to build a life that felt SO good every day, even on the difficult days.
My business started to expand, I attracted more abundance and grew my online community from 1500 to 12K in the space of 2 months.
Because I felt free, I could be myself.
Life had colour again. I was home.
My promise to you
If you can relate to any of my story, I promise you that you are not alone.
This is YOUR life. And you are worthy of creating a life that makes you feel at peace, every single day.
Life isn't linear, but when you have the tools to regulate your nervous system and confront uncomfortable feelings with love, you can achieve ANYTHING. And your courage + confidence grows from there.
I promise that you're worthy, you're loved, and you can do hard things.
Together, we can take that walk home to freedom and I would be honoured to support you in your journey.